{"id":717,"date":"2005-02-09T15:08:00","date_gmt":"2005-02-09T15:08:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/2005\/02\/short-takes.html"},"modified":"2005-02-09T15:08:00","modified_gmt":"2005-02-09T15:08:00","slug":"short-takes","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/2005\/02\/short-takes.html","title":{"rendered":"Short Takes"},"content":{"rendered":"

–All of my mom friends have e-mail. And at about 8 p.m., e-mail suddenly comes to life. All day long, I get one, maybe two e-mails. But once all those kiddies have been put to bed, suddenly I get six, eight, or ten e-mails at a time.
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–Doodles’s poops smell worse than other kids’ poops. I unfortunately have empirical proof of this.
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–Finally new videos<\/a> up (if you want to see them but don’t have the password, just drop me an e-mail). But in looking at what videos to post, I see that a good half of our videos have extremely abrupt endings. Generally as you hear me saying, “Doodles! No touch!” or you see Doodles do something like grab the telephone and start to dial and then suddenly, bam!<\/i> the tape stops.
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–I no longer believe in Darwinism. It’s the natural selection part that’s done me in. By the laws of natural selection (basically that nature selects the best adapted varieties to survive and to reproduce), there’s no way my child would still be alive. Let’s take his Sit N Spin<\/a>. We have the same conversation multiple times a day. “Doodles,” I say, “that’s a Sit<\/i> N Spin. Not a Stand<\/i> N Spin. Remember what happened five minutes ago when you stood on it?” But apparently he doesn’t because he flashes me one of his melt-me Doodle grins and proceeds to stand on it. And, hey, what a look of shock on his face when he goes flying off and hits his head on the floor!
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–I rue the day I put batteries in his toys. In any of the toys. Truth be told, the toys taken individually don’t bother me. It’s when I have a CD on and Doodles runs to push the song on his Sit N Spin and then runs over to one of his song books and hits the button and then he sets off his Laugh and Learn Home<\/a> at the same time. That reminds me: I need to put Tylenol on the shopping list.
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–Aha! More evidence that the rules of natural selection do not apply in our household. I’m sitting at the dining room table typing. All of a sudden I looked up and saw my child’s grinning head above the table, grabbing for my keys. Okay. He’s allowed to have my keys. Except my child is quite short. About 30 inches. He’s never been above the 25th percentile for his height. And the table is about 36 inches tall. I peek beneath the table. Did my child grab some books to stand on? Nah. What about his Lego Table? Not that either. Try his plastic rocking horse (I call it a horse; I’m not sure what it is. Rocking Blob would probably be most accurate. Most of these toys mentioned have been generous hand-me-downs from neighbors). He’s standing on the one thing that doesn’t have a flat bottom. Hey, guess who was surprised when he fell? Will wonders never cease?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

–All of my mom friends have e-mail. And at about 8 p.m., e-mail suddenly comes to life. All day long, I get one, maybe two e-mails. But once all those kiddies have been put to bed, suddenly I get six, eight, or ten e-mails at a time. –Doodles’s poops smell worse than other kids’ poops. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-717","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/717","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=717"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/717\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=717"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=717"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=717"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}