We started the day with my charming son poking my stomach and declaring, “Hey, Mommy? You’ve got a squishy stomach!” It only improved from there…<\/p>\n
Me: Hey Adam, didn’t you say Johnny Damon wasn’t the brightest guy? And all before seven in the morning…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" We started the day with my charming son poking my stomach and declaring, “Hey, Mommy? You’ve got a squishy stomach!” It only improved from there… Me: Hey Adam, didn’t you say Johnny Damon wasn’t the brightest guy?Adam: Yeah.Me: So did you see these reading ads he’s doing? [I show him an ad in Runners World […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-389","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/389","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=389"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/389\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=389"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=389"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=389"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
Adam: Yeah.
Me: So did you see these reading ads he’s doing? [I show him an ad in Runners World<\/a> that has Johnny Damon in his Yankee uniform reading<\/a> a biography of Ben Franklin<\/a>]. He’s probably not really reading a biography on Ben Franklin, huh?
Adam: [laughing] No, I would think not. He’s also probably not going to be a Yankee soon.
Me: Why?
Adam: For the same reason the Sox didn’t re-sign him: because he’s getting old and declining and slow.
Me [to Doodles]: That’s not nice! Does that mean you’re going to trade me? What do you think, Doodles, do you want to trade me for a mommy who’s younger and faster?
Doodles: Yes!
Adam: Tell Mommy we’re looking for someone who can hit for average.
Doodles: I want a mommy who can hit for average.
Adam: And with a little bit of power, too.
Doodles: And with a little power, too. [pause, thinking] And nicer!<\/p>\n