{"id":2380,"date":"2013-12-17T08:00:08","date_gmt":"2013-12-17T13:00:08","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/?p=2380"},"modified":"2013-12-16T10:43:54","modified_gmt":"2013-12-16T15:43:54","slug":"parenting-101","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/2013\/12\/parenting-101.html","title":{"rendered":"Parenting 101"},"content":{"rendered":"

I have learned the hard way that honesty is not<\/em> the best policy with my children. <\/p>\n

About a week ago, I took Adam out for a birthday dinner. While we were out I left gingerbread, frosting, jelly beans, and M&Ms for the kids and babysitter to enjoy. They each decorated a large gingerbread man, and the boy ate a bit of his cookie before deciding he didn’t really like it, and the girl ate about two-thirds of hers before the babysitter suggested that the cookie\/candy\/pie (from Adam’s birthday) might be a deadly combo and be contributing to her bouncing off the walls.<\/p>\n

The cookies sat around for a few days. Until I got hungry. So I ate the boy’s cookie. Because I knew he wouldn’t care. And then I ate the girl’s cookie. Because I wanted more cookie. However, I discovered that the candy on the cookie wasn’t great, so I picked that off. But the candy was covering large parts of the girl’s cookie, so after I decimated it, there were still chunks of cookie left that I ended up throwing out. <\/p>\n

And of course, three days after that, the girl asks, “Where’s my cookie?”<\/p>\n

Me: I threw it out.<\/p>\n

The girl: WHAT!!??<\/p>\n

Me: It was getting gross.So I threw it out.<\/p>\n

The girl: You threw it all out?<\/p>\n

Me: Yeah. But it’s not like there was much left after I had eaten it.<\/p>\n

The girl: [Tears forming in her eye, chin starting to quiver] You. Ate. My. Cookie?<\/p>\n

The boy: Duh. What do you think happens to the sweets left here?<\/p>\n

Me: It was going bad anyway. So I just ate it before it was too gross.<\/p>\n

The girl: You. Ate. My. Cookie?<\/p>\n

Me: It wasn’t just you! I ate the boy’s too!<\/p>\n

The girl. You. Ate. My. Cookie?<\/p>\n

Me, at this point trying to avoid the impending meltdown, and counting on distractibility of child: Who wants to drink hot chocolate in front of a TV show!<\/p>\n

The girl, hopping off the kitchen stool: Okay! Me!<\/p>\n

Moral of this story: Lie to your children. And make sure not to leave any crumbs. And that, my friends, is parenting at it’s finest.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I have learned the hard way that honesty is not the best policy with my children. About a week ago, I took Adam out for a birthday dinner. While we were out I left gingerbread, frosting, jelly beans, and M&Ms for the kids and babysitter to enjoy. They each decorated a large gingerbread man, and […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2380","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2380","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2380"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2380\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2380"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2380"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2380"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}