{"id":2099,"date":"2012-06-25T21:45:11","date_gmt":"2012-06-26T01:45:11","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/?p=2099"},"modified":"2012-06-25T21:46:25","modified_gmt":"2012-06-26T01:46:25","slug":"are-you-one-are-you-two","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/2012\/06\/are-you-one-are-you-two.html","title":{"rendered":"Are You One? Are You Two?"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Two years ago, for my birthday, I got lice. And by &#8220;I,&#8221; I of course mean me, my daughter, and my son. I spent my birthday literally nitpicking. Last year I got Adam&#8217;s high school reunion with funky cold medinas and no cake. So I knew that [warning: TMI alert] when I went to the bathroom this morning and discovered my pee was red that clearly I had a kidney infection. What else can I expect from my birthday?<\/p>\n<p>One Google search later and I had narrowed it down to two options: I either had Porphyria (a hereditary disease  in which part of the hemoglobin is not made) or I had beets last night. A quick mental scan of the previous night revealed it was the latter.<\/p>\n<p>We can stop right there. This birthday is a success. Let&#8217;s call it a day before anyone can screw it up.<\/p>\n<p>No, no, the day turned out perfectly lovely, although not as blog-worthy as some people might have hoped. I got a solid morning of writing done (the second draft of my novel is on target to be finished in the next week), the girl and I had pedis, and then we all had a lovely dinner out. And, yes, there was cake. Of course for the &#8220;Are you one? Are you two? Are you three?&#8221; my boy had to be clever and count by tens. But I suppose that&#8217;s the logical thing to do when you have a middle-aged mom. (I said to the girl, &#8220;When Nana was my age, she had a daughter who was the same age she was when I was born.&#8221; The girl said, &#8220;Really? Who was the daughter!&#8221;)<\/p>\n<p>And now I&#8217;m going to look over my booty, drink my whiskey sour, and revel in my middle-agedness. Happy old to me!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Two years ago, for my birthday, I got lice. And by &#8220;I,&#8221; I of course mean me, my daughter, and my son. I spent my birthday literally nitpicking. Last year I got Adam&#8217;s high school reunion with funky cold medinas and no cake. So I knew that [warning: TMI alert] when I went to the [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[36],"class_list":["post-2099","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-birthday"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2099","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2099"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2099\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2099"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2099"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2099"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}