{"id":1033,"date":"2003-07-27T08:16:00","date_gmt":"2003-07-27T08:16:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/2003\/07\/buoyancy.html"},"modified":"2003-07-27T08:16:00","modified_gmt":"2003-07-27T08:16:00","slug":"buoyancy","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/2003\/07\/buoyancy.html","title":{"rendered":"Buoyancy"},"content":{"rendered":"

As Brown Brown still hasn’t turned and I’m becoming increasingly more desperate as his ever-growing noggin expands into the ever-decreasing room formerly known as my chest and now known as that friggin’ parasite’s cocoon (the term parasite<\/i> left us for a while, huh? Well, it’s baaaack!), I’m trying all the techniques I can find to get him to assume the position. I’m spending a lot of time hanging out in the living room on my hands and knees and rubbing my belly. I’ve tried talking to him–both in nice soothing tones and in that “I’m counting to three” tone.<\/p>\n

Well, as long as I have my weekly swim, I figured I’d try the handstand<\/a> technique. I felt like an idiot, because it’s a normal lap swim, which means you aren’t supposed to be goofing around. All around me, people are doing their rapid laps while I do my leisurely swim (I do nothing<\/i> non-leisurely anymore. The only thing that has me moving quickly these days is my bladder), so between laps, I furtively try to sneak in some handstands. Have you ever tried to do a handstand when you are at your most floaty? Impossible I tell you! I could do two for maybe .35 seconds each before I’d float one way or another. So I quickly gave that up. Besides, it sounds like a stupid idea anyway. Wouldn’t that just have the baby turning in the wrong direction? I don’t get it.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

As Brown Brown still hasn’t turned and I’m becoming increasingly more desperate as his ever-growing noggin expands into the ever-decreasing room formerly known as my chest and now known as that friggin’ parasite’s cocoon (the term parasite left us for a while, huh? Well, it’s baaaack!), I’m trying all the techniques I can find to […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1033","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1033","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1033"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1033\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1033"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1033"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennyandadam.com\/Jenny\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1033"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}