Our DVR is so backed up that it’s randomly deleting stuff. I don’t like it when my stuff is randomly deleted. I told Adam to get me one with more GBs. He said there wasn’t one. So now we’re on a mad dash to watch all the shows we’ve saved. Which means I get to blog, because Grey’s Anatomy is on our list and I can only watch the non-gory parts. Adam tells me when it’s safe to look, and I’ll chat with you guys when it’s gross. I think we’re pretty close to done with the show.
It’s the end of the weekend, although we really don’t have weekends anymore. Hockey has started. The boy has hockey now twice a weekend and next week the girl starts, too (at different times). That plus Hebrew school plus drum lessons plus the usual birthday parties (two this weekend) and playdates (two this weekend), and weekends are pretty much kaput.
I’ve been working the haus frau thing to the max. We went apple picking a couple of weekends ago, and the kids wanted the BIG bag for apple picking. “What are we going to do with twenty pounds of apples?” I asked. “Puh-lease!” they begged. We caved. This was the first year when the kids did all the picking. In the old days, they’d pick for five minutes and then we’d take over. Not this year. They were picking machines. We had to stop them when the bag was overflowing–definitely more than twenty pounds.
And I used them. Every freakin’ last one of them. I used apples in salads, apples with peanut butter, apples in oatmeal. I made apple butter, apple sauce, apple-pumpkin muffins, apple-apple muffins, apple crisp, mini-apple pies, apple fruit roll-ups.
What else can I tell you while Dr. Altman does her heart surgery? Pie has reverted back to impossible bedtimes. It’s gotten to the point where tonight, as she was whining her way upstairs, that Doodles shook his head and announced, “This is not going to end well.”
The boy lost a front tooth. He tortured me with it for a while first–pushing it out of his mouth at odd angles–but it finally came out. He put it under his pillow. The tooth fairy came. She left a dollar and a note. Unfortunately, she wrote a joke in her note (Why do vampires brush their teeth three times a day? So they won’t have bat breath). The next morning, the accusation came: “Mom, you left it, didn’t you?”
Me: Why would you say that?
The boy: Because there was a joke in there and you know lots of jokes.
Hmmm. Didn’t think about that. I leave jokes in lunch boxes. The tooth fairy leaves jokes in her notes.
Me: Well, what was the joke?
The boy: Why does the vampire brush his teeth?
Me: I don’t know. Why?
The boy: Um… what was it? Oh, because his teeth are batty.
I could honestly say: I’ve never heard that before! Nope, not me.
He better watch himself. Next time, the Tooth Fairy just might leave him apples.
