Water Water Everywhere

May 3rd, 2010 Comments Off on Water Water Everywhere

I went to Starbucks this morning. So I made myself a cup of coffee. To bring with me. Because Starbucks isn’t serving coffee. Duh.

It’s teacher appreciation week. And, somehow, I ended up co-chairing it with Beetle. I seem to recall the previous chair saying things like, “Oh it’s practically nothing.” “You seem like a hero for very little work.” “It’s soooo easy!” I’ve decided last year’s chair is my new nemesis.

(Please take a moment to here to channel Dr. Doofenshmirtz:

“I used to sit alone doing evil all day,
But now I think that someone’s gonna get in my way, yeah,
The someone in my life that doesn’t want me to exist,
My neme, neme, oooo… my neme, neme, neme
And I feel fine cause I’ve got a nemesis.”

Okay, all done with Heinz.)

Teacher appreciation week requires two travel boxes of coffee in the teachers’ lounge every morning. Except, as you may know, we have no water. Nor does Lexington. Nor Boston. Nor Brookline. Nor… Well, you get the idea. And apparently all the Starbucks and Dunkin Donuts (please note, I still detest DD, but when you’re desperate, you’re desperate. And the majority of Bostonians seem to prefer it, anyway. Which just goes to show you what kind of taste Bostonians have) have their coffee machines wired to get the water straight from the plumbing. So they can’t make coffee. So I made my own coffee to go down to Starbucks in a desperate attempt to find caffeine for our teachers (see! we appreciate you!). Starbucks was selling only bottled drinks, pastries, and Via. So I bought a bunch of instant coffee, figuring teachers could microwave water for the requisite one minute of boiling. But lo and behold another parent found that Cambridge does indeed have coffee. The day is saved!

Meanwhile, our house is a mess, as I refuse to try and wash dishes using boiled water as it’s a pain in the ass. Dishes are just scattered about the counters and tables. I have run the dishwasher once on the sanitize cycle, but I’d prefer to just embrace the mess and avoid that. It’s a good excuse to not cook.

But that’s okay because there’s apparently still tea available. At least that’s what I think I understand. All I know is that a voicemail came today inviting me to a post-Tea Party summit where I can learn how to take back our country this November and I can learn how to organize for a free America. Free from E. coli and boiled water? That sounds nice. I had to boil water to keep in my tea kettle, as my tea kettle shuts off when it reaches a boil and I generally want my tea now so I don’t have the patience to make it on the stove top. I hope they boil their water for at least a full minute before steeping the tea. Although, perhaps this call was for my Republican husband? In which case, I suppose, he’s busy and I won’t mind if the rest of them get E. coli.

Water water, every where
nor any drop to drink.

L’chaim!

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